


Principles of Sea Star and Flounder Interaction

by CaptainJZH



Category: SpongeBob SquarePants (Cartoon)
Genre: Backstory, Gen, Originally posted on SBMania, Prequel, script-format
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-04
Updated: 2017-04-04
Packaged: 2018-10-14 21:05:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,327
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10544322
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaptainJZH/pseuds/CaptainJZH
Summary: Patrick tells the story of his community college days, where he became friends with Flatts the Flounder and went up against the bully Bubble Bass.





	

We open on SpongeBob knocking on Patrick’s rock. It opens up, revealing Patrick looking in a photo album.

SPONGEBOB: Hey Pat, whatcha doin’?

PATRICK: I’m looking through pictures of my old community college days.

SpongeBob climbs into the hole.

PATRICK: Ah, I remember my first week...

We zoom in on a picture in the album of the front steps of Bikini Bottom Community College and fade into the past. It all looks somewhat like the 1980s. A boatmobile pulls up.

PATRICK (V.O.): I had just set out on my own, despite my parents pleading me to stay.

Patrick is kicked out of the boat and it speeds off. He has a mullet and an “I’m with Stupid” T-Shirt. He gets up and looks at the sign.

PATRICK: “Commurity… Collage?”

We cut to Patrick at the desk in the admissions office. He is handed a set of keys and his student card.

SECRETARY: Here you go!

PATRICK: I must say, this is the greatest hotel I’ve ever been to!

Patrick walks away. When he reaches his room, he opens the door, seeing Bubble Bass unpacking.

PATRICK: Hey! I believe you are miss-taken. This is my room.

Bubble Bass marches over to Patrick.

BUBBLE BASS: Listen, fatso. I don’t know who you think you are-

PATRICK: Well, I *think* I’m Patrick Star.

Bubble Bass bursts into laughter.

BUBBLE BASS: You’re a riot, Ricky-boy.

PATRICK (quietly): My name’s not-

BUBBLE BASS: This is *my* room, and-

Flatts steps in behind Patrick.

FLATTS: Hey! What are you doing in our room?

Bubble Bass freezes.

BUBBLE BASS: Uh…

He quickly grabs his stuff and jumps out the window. Flatts sticks out his hand.

FLATTS: Flatts Flounder.

PATRICK: No, I’m Patrick.

Flatts chuckles

FLATTS: And I’m Flatts. I guess we're roomies. C’mon, let’s get to orientation.

In the auditorium, Patrick and Flatts sit down. The Dean stands on stage.

DEAN: Welcome to Bikini Bottom Community College!

PATRICK: Who’s he?

FLATTS: The head of the school.

PATRICK: School?

Flashback to Patrick getting slammed into a locker in Elementary School

FLATTS: Yes, school.

Flashback to Patrick getting slammed into a locker in Middle School

PATRICK: School???

FLATTS (slightly annoyed): Yes, school!

Flashback to Patrick (and his mother) being slammed into a locker during his Senior Prom. Someone takes his picture before the door shuts.

PATRICK (screaming): School???!!!

Patrick gets out of his seat and runs away, screaming in terror. Since he doesn’t have an aisle seat, he steps on everyone on his way out.

At the Krusty Krab, a “Help Wanted” sign sits in the window. Patrick marches up to the counter. Squidward, wearing a very obvious toupee, is reading a magazine. Patrick slams a plastic card onto the register.

PATRICK: Give me everything you got!

SQUIDWARD (looking up from his magazine): No.

PATRICK: Well, why not?!

SQUIDWARD: First of all, you're paying with Jellyfish Fields membership card.

Closeup of the card. Patrick is making a silly face on it.

SQUIDWARD: Secondly, our latest fry cook just quit and I for one am *not* going to do the cooking, nor am I going to drag Mr. Krabs out of his money bath to do it himself, unless you happened to have an extraordinarily large sack of cash.

A money bag is dropped onto the register.

FLATTS: Is that extraordinarily large enough?

Mr. Krabs (who is wearing his fake sideburns from The Original Fry Cook) drops in from the rafters, right on top of Squidward. He is in a towel, with dollar bills following him down.

KRABS: It'll do.

Later, Patrick and Flatts are sitting at a table, splitting apart their large pile of Krabby Patties.

PATRICK: I can't go back to school. I refuse!

Flatts farts.

FLATTS: I gotta go. Don't eat anything from my pile.

After Flatts leaves, Bubble Bass walks in. He goes up to Squidward.

BUBBLE BASS: You're toupee looks terrible.

He pulls it off and throws it off screen. There's a glass-shattering sound effect. Squidward chases after it.

SQUIDWARD: My hair!

He laughs with joy and goes over to Patrick’s table.

BUBBLE BASS: Excuse me, but I believe you're sitting in my favorite seat, tubby.

PATRICK: Tubby?

BUBBLE BASS: I'm going to tell you again: You're. Sitting. In my. Favorite. Seat.

PATRICK: I was here first. I am not moving from this spot!

BUBBLE BASS: If that's the way you want it.

Flatts walks out of the restroom. Patrick gets slammed against the wall next to Flatts. Bubble Bass looks at them.

FLATTS: Nobody does that to my friend!

PATRICK: (muffled) Friend?

BUBBLE BASS: Aw, the starfish has to rely on someone else to protect him? How cute.

Patrick peels his face off the wall.

PATRICK: It’s Sea Star!

Flatts folds his arms and takes a step forward.

BUBBLE BASS: (quickly) Oh would you look at the time I should go!

Bubble Bass runs out of the restaurant. Patrick pops off of the wall and lies on the floor.

FLATTS: You okay?

PATRICK: Did you mean it when you called me your friend?

FLATTS: Sure.

Patrick gives Flatts a big hug. Flatts looks uncomfortable.

PATRICK: Can you teach me how to be more insertive?

FLATTS: What?

Patrick lets go.

PATRICK: Like what you did with him just now. All you had to do was step forward and he ran away. How'd you do that?

Flatts smiles

FLATTS: C’mon, I'll show you the ropes.

We cut to Patrick next to ropes.

PATRICK: These ones?

We cut to live action footage of a drummer doing the “ba-dum-tish” bad joke sting.

In their dorm room, Flatts sits across from Patrick.

FLATTS: You gotta have an air of confidence wherever you go. When people look at me, they see someone who isn't going to let anyone tell them what to do.

He walks over to a small chalk board on an easel and draws a picture of Patrick.

FLATTS: First of all, you slouch.

PATRICK: But I'm comfortable!

Flatts nudges the Patrick Drawing with his fin so it stands up straight.

PAT DRAWING: Hey!

FLATTS: Next, you need to look people straight in the eye.

He draws a Bubble Bass picture and nudges the Pat Drawing’s head so it looks straight at the BB Drawing.

BB Drawing: How dare you look me in the eye!

BB Drawing picks up a piece of chalk and walks towards Pat Drawing, who begins to step backwards. Flatts stops him.

FLATTS: No, no. Maintain eye contact. And suck in your gut. Show him you're not afraid.

Pat Drawing screams, hops off the chalkboard, and runs out of the room, with BB Drawing chasing him with the chalk.

FLATTS: Maybe we should get help from the school staff.

Cut to scenes of the residency advisor, secretary, janitor, counselor, nurse, and Dean all laughing and slamming doors in their faces.

FLATTS: Well Patrick... I guess it's time to kick his butt!

We then enter a Rocky-style montage of Patrick working out, but failing miserably, even with the motivation of food.

PATRICK: This working out thing isn't working out.

TITLE CARD/NARRATOR: The Following Evening

Patrick is moping around in his dorm room. Flatts enters.

FLATTS: Hey, there's a fireworks show tonight. You wanna come?

PATRICK: Nah, Bubble Bass will probably be there. I don't think I'm ready to confront him.

FLATTS: You'll do fine.

We cut to outside. Pat Drawing and BB Drawing run along the bottom of the screen, still chasing each other.

Flatts pushes Patrick down the sidewalk.

PATRICK: You really think I can do it?

FLATTS: Most definitively.

PATRICK: Then okay! I'm easily convinced!

Patrick walks over to Bubble Bass, back straightened, gut sucked in, and looking right into his eyes.

PATRICK: Excuse me, but I believe you're sitting in my favorite seat.

Bubble Bass stands up. Patrick begins to cower, but stands his ground.

BUBBLE BASS: What did just you say, tubby?

PATRICK: Nobody, NOBODY calls me tubby, especially you. Because you. Are sitting. In my. Favor. It. Seat.

Other fish take notice.

BUBBLE BASS: Well what are you gonna do about it, starfish?

PATRICK: It's SEA STAR!

Bubble Bass moves to punch Patrick in the gut, but Pat stops sucking it in and lets it all out so the punch bounces off, sending Bubble Bass flying into a bunch of trash cans.

The crowd starts cheering for Patrick. Flatts smiles.

BUBBLE BASS: This ain't over yet.

PATRICK: I am not moving from this spot!

He runs at Patrick and jumps. Patrick slouches and looks down, causing Bubble Bass to jump straight over him.

At the fireworks launch site, a technician is about to light the fuses. Bubble Bass lands on top of him and the launch platform, resulting in all the fireworks being set off at very dangerous angles.

The crowd runs away, screaming.

We cut to Plankton (who has an overly-large Afro wig on and big glasses) walking out of the science department with Karen (who is a cumbersome, relatively low-tech computer being wheeled around in a cart)

PLANKTON: I hope we aren't late for the fireworks, Karen!

A firework lands on Plankton, setting him on fire. He screams.

KAREN: (slightly more robotic voice) No, it seems we’ve just made it.

Over at the culinary school, a familiar yellow sponge is cooking up a burger. We don't see his face, only his hands. A teacher comes by to taste it.

TEACHER: Still undercooked.

After he walks away, a firework comes in through the window and hits the grill, exploding and setting it on fire. The teacher comes by again and tastes it.

TEACHER: A bit fiery, but very good!

Fireworks rain down on the campus. The Dean runs out of his office.

DEAN: Who caused this?

BUBBLE BASS: Patrick Star, sir! Oh, and his friend Flatts.

They all turn towards Patrick and Flatts.

DEAN: Get them!

The crowd runs towards the two.

PATRICK: How do we get out of here?

FLATTS: We'll take my boat. It's over there!

They run through the parking lot and get into Flatts’ boatmobile.

He tries to pull out but drives forward instead, crashing into (and driving on top of) the vehicle in front of him. It turns out to be a police boat.

A police fish walks out of a building.

POLICE FISH: These night classes are really helping!

He looks at his wrecked boat. Patrick and Flatts awkwardly smile.

POLICE FISH: Hold it right there!

Flatts shifts his boat into reverse and speeds off, with the angry mob right behind them.

We cut to Bikini Bottom news. The Realistic Fish Head has sideburns. A picture of one of the apes from Chimps Ahoy is next to him.

FISH HEAD: ...the Mammalian Science Association has therefore voted to delay their deep sea relocation project for several more years. In other news, crisis at Bikini Bottom Community College! We now go live to their TV station with reporter-in-training Perch Perkins.

Perch Perkins has longer hair and wears glasses. His voice is cracking and squeaky.

PERCH: I… Uh… Gosh, thanks! Oh, it's chaos here at BBCC. Initial reports state that a freak fireworks accident set off an angry mob, though I haven't seen any sign of that yet.

Flatts’ boatmobile speeds past.

PERCH: Hey jerk! I'm in the middle of my exclusive!

The angry mob runs him and the camera over, going to static.

Patrick and Flatts drive towards the front gates of the campus, with police boats and the mob chasing after them.

PATRICK: Put the pedal to the metal!

Patrick slams his foot on top of Flatts’s, flooring the accelerator.

FLATTS: We're gonna make it!

Suddenly, the boat’s engine gives out and it drifts to a stop.

The mob quickly surrounds them.

DEAN: Mr. Star, Mr. Flounder? You are hereby expelled from Bikini Bottom Community College.

He rips up their student IDs.

POLICE FISH: Also, for reckless endangerment, Mr. Flounder’s license is suspended, and he will NOT be eligible to take a boating test for many years to come.

He rips up Flatts's license.

The next morning, Flatts is packing up his stuff into his parents’ boat outside the front gates. Patrick walks up to him.

PATRICK: Sorry I got us kicked out of school, Flatts.

FLATTS: Hey, don’t worry about it.

PATRICK: Will I ever see you again?

FLATTS: Maybe someday.

FLATTS’S DAD: Let's go, son.

They shake hands and Flatts gets in the car. As it drives off, Patrick turns around and walks down the street, with his head lowered sadly.

After walking around for a while, he hears SpongeBob’s laugh and looks up. He sees SB chasing a jellyfish in front of his parent’s house.

SB’S MOM: Don’t stay out too long SpongeBob! You start Boating School tomorrow!

A truck driver drives quickly up the road. SpongeBob chases the jellyfish into the road, directly in the path of the truck. He repeatedly jumps up into the air, trying to catch the jellyfish in his net.

SPONGEBOB: Almost gotcha…

Patrick runs forward, leaps into the road, and pushes SpongeBob out of the way. They land on the side of the road as the truck rushes past.

SPONGEBOB: Whoa.

He extends his hand out.

SPONGEBOB: SpongeBob SquarePants.

PATRICK: No, I’m Patrick.

SPONGEBOB: Hey, weren’t you the one who accidentally set off the fireworks at the Community College?

PATRICK: Yeah…

SPONGEBOB: Thank you so much! It really helped me pass a test in my fry cooking class. The grill kept being underheated and the rogue firework cooked up my burger just in time!

The jellyfish floats above them.

SPONGEBOB: So… Wanna go jellyfishing?

PATRICK: Would I?!

Patrick pulls out a jellyfishing net and the two chase the jellyfish, laughing all the way.

We fade back into the present day, where SpongeBob has fallen asleep. Patrick smiles and goes to sleep himself.

We cut to outside, where Pat Drawing finally has the upper hand against BB Drawing, and is now chasing him with the piece of chalk.

THE END


End file.
